My Almost Read online

  “My boyfriend’s a dick.” Dan hung out with his ex-fuck buddy at her house with just her and he doesn’t understand why I’m upset about it.

  “So dump him.” Reid says, as if it’s the easiest thing in the world.

  “It’s more complicated than that.” It’s almost our one-year anniversary and his birthday is in January and there are just so many other factors to consider.

  Reid and Reese walk away, but Aiden lingers beside me.

  “You deserve better.” He raps his knuckles on the counter and holds my gaze as he backs away.

  I assumed tonight would be busy, so I’m shocked to find out the mall is dead as dirt. And when the cat’s away the mice will play.

  We have the music turned up to full blast, we’re dancing on the benches, hiding throughout the store, and playing pranks on one another. Aiden and Reese undress the mannequins and put on all the apparel. It’s equal parts ridiculous and hilarious.

  “Reese, can I use the bathroom?” Even our employee bathroom requires a key to access and only managers hold the key. It’s childish.

  He tosses me the key and I rush off. When I come back, the three of them are standing in a semi-circle in the middle of the sales floor, getting all braggy with one another. They’re such dudes.

  For all intents and purposes, they’re having a pissing contest, but I sit back and watch. I can’t help enjoying the show.

  “Whose body do you think is hottest?” Aiden waves down his body and raises his eyebrows at me with sexual provocation. “Come on, Chels, tell us.” They’re somehow forgetting one major contender here.

  “I think you all know who I’m gonna say.” I shoot a pointed look at Reid which makes him roll his eyes. I can’t help it. He’s hot, and he’s the most buff of the three. I want to lick him from head to ankle—I hate feet so that’s out of the question, which is ironic since I work in a shoe store.

  “Are you sure about that?” Aiden lifts his shirt right there in the middle of the store. He smirks at me, a boyish grin full of mischief.

  My feelings for Aiden have always been platonic at best and full-on disdain at worst. Still, my cheeks heat and I want to divert my gaze, but I can’t.

  I’m not sure how his girlfriend would feel about this. Not that Aiden has ever mentioned he was dating someone, but he was here shopping with that cute blonde the one day and he was holding her hand so, one plus one equals…

  Still, my eyes are saucers as I stare without shame at his bod—his hairy bod. It’s not like he’s Chewbacca or anything, but I’m used to Dan’s bare chest.

  “Stop, my virgin eyes can’t handle it,” I joke, turning my head and mock-covering my eyes.

  “Oh, please,” Aiden scoffs, laughing. I giggle in response, partially out of awkwardness, but also deviously. The guys know I’m not-so-innocent.

  I make sex jokes like I’m one of the guys and my boyfriend is in his twenties. I’ve never claimed I’m a sexless nun or at all religious to infer celibacy.

  I always thought body or chest hair would be a complete turn off for me, but after seeing Aiden lift his shirt, I realize I’m not opposed to it. I wonder what it would feel like under my touch, running my hands over his chest or kissing it. Would it be soft or wiry? Would it tickle my palms?

  I can’t even believe those thoughts just entered my head. For the first time I’m viewing Aiden in a different light. His cockiness is kind of a turn-on. His sense of humor is out of this world and he makes me laugh every time we talk.

  Maybe I’m a sex-crazed teenager with hormones running wild. Lord knows Dan isn’t helping at all in that department. But… this might be different. Aiden is different. I have to admit our friendship is growing by the day and he’s eliciting feelings out of me Dan never has.

  Dan and I were never friends first. I met him once, then we hung out, and then we were dating. I didn’t even know him and if I did, and if I was honest with myself, I wouldn’t be dating him now.

  We don’t have any similar interests, there’s no spark at all, and he doesn’t even make me laugh. He makes me roll my eyes in irritation more than anything. I keep finding more and more excuses to not spend time with him when in reality I should end it.

  It’s taken this trivial moment, this pivotal instant for me to understand why people say it’s important to have a foundation of friendship established before a relationship.

  If Dan and I were friends first things might be different. Maybe we’d respect each other more, get along better, understand one another. Or we might’ve realized we were never a good fit.

  Then again, if I changed my history with him, it might’ve changed the path I was headed.

  ∞ ∞ ∞

  I only seem to be working with Aiden these days. We both have school in the mornings which forces us to work nights together. Although, I have a theory that Seth offsets my inability to sell with his extraordinary sales skills. Either way, I don’t mind. It’s fun working with him.

  At least he hasn’t blinded me with his chest hair again since the last incident. Thank God. I’m not complaining, not one bit. Why would I want to see Aiden shirtless? I don’t. Nope, not me.

  I seem to always be the one talking about my relationshit to everyone at work, but tonight Aiden is talking to Reese about his girlfriend.

  “Watcha guys talking about?” I skip up to my coworkers and butt into the conversation knowing full well what they’re talking about.

  “This girl I’m seeing. She’s short, blonde, cute.” He shrugs with nonchalance. He doesn’t realize I was the one working that day he came in with her. Jess.

  “You were in here with her a few weeks ago, right?” He nods in response. “Yeah, she’s really pretty,” I tell him, my voice loaded with sincerity. Aiden and I are just friends. I’m not jealous of her at all. “So, she’s like, your girlfriend?”

  “No we’re not dating…she just spends the night sometimes.” His eyes glimmer, making the blue-gray color appear lighter.

  I got the hint. “Oh, so you’re fucking her. You’re just like, friends with benefits,” I plaster on a knowing smile. He smirks back at me and chuckles because I’m right

  “Yeah, and it’s good so…” the sentence hangs and the air tingles with awkwardness.

  “Well good for you, then.” I may not be in the best relationship, but Aiden and I are friends, so if that’s what works for him, then I mean it with utter sincerity.

  That was the first and last time I ever saw him with that girl. Maybe their relationship ran its course and fizzled out or something else could’ve sparked the downfall. Either way, I should’ve taken the hint.

  The girl was gorgeous and funny and he didn’t keep her around. He couldn’t seem to ever keep a girl around or ever call any of them his girlfriend. He was a serial dater and I wish I had picked up on these little clues sooner.

  4

  Whiskey

  The next few months fly by in a whirlwind. Senior year evaporates right in front of my eyes in a mix of schoolwork, soccer, and my job. I blink and it’s graduation. I sent in a deposit for the college of my choosing, and now it’s off to senior week for a week of post-graduation partying with all my friends.

  It’s a school tradition. Everyone in the graduating class rents a house for a week by the beach in Maryland, and I’m heading down with my besties. It’s guaranteed to be a shit-show, but at least I get to relax and enjoy the fact I’m done with high school forever.

  I rented a place with my five best friends, Tia, Callie, Alison, Ellie, and Sarah. We split into two cars and head off. We have a condo near the boardwalk booked for the week, we pack our cars with a ton of snacks and booze, and as long as we all packed bikinis, we’re set.

  It takes about three and a half hours to get to Maryland and we’re all antsy to arrive. We’re getting closer to the house and I’m at a stop light. Alison is sitting in my passenger seat and a few feet up on the left I notice two cops with radar guns.

  “I think we need to calm down a li
ttle.” She pulls out a baggie of weed, lifting it high in the air—no pun intended—right in front of the officers. Sometimes she brings the stereotype of blondes being dumb to fruition.

  “Allie, there're cops right there put the fucking weed away.” She laughs as she drops the bag onto her lap. Cops make me sweat bullets in general, but it’s ten times worse now since we’re all underage in my car full of booze and pot.

  “See, look at you. You really do need to chill out.” We’re about five feet past the officers when she brings out a joint and lights up.

  She offers me it and I take it, ready to smoke up. I’m on vacation and I had a killer senior year—I deserve it.

  Allie and I are full-blown buzzed by the time we pull up to the condo. Tia jumps out of the car as she sighs in relief. She’s not a smoker and wasn’t hell-bent on being in the car while I drove under the influence, but now she can relax.

  Tia and I met through our boyfriends. Her beau is Shane, Dan’s best friend. We hang out a lot with them and she’s become one of my best friends.

  We get mistaken for sisters a lot, with our dark brown hair and pale complexions. She’s a hair taller than me but we’re two peas in a pod. We have the same personality and I’m grateful we met through our boyfriends. Even if her friendship is the only good thing to come out of my relationship.

  The woman we rented the condo from owns a bunch of them and lives in one of the adjacent apartments. She comes out to greet us, a seemingly permanent frown etched onto her face based on the deep wrinkles pulling around her lips.

  “Hi, I’m Helen, the owner. When you stay here, you will follow the rules or you’ll get kicked out. There will be no booze, no noise after ten p.m., and absolutely no boys. Break any of these rules and you’re out.”

  This woman’s bound to be a total nightmare. She’s old and miserable. It’s obvious we’re here to have fun, and she’s sucking away all our opportunity before we can even start. Bitch.

  While I don’t think most of us plan to bring any guys home, we can’t ignore the other issues at hand. Our cars are packed-full of beer, liquor, and marijuana. How the hell are we supposed to sneak it all by her and into the house?

  We have to wait until nightfall to sneak it all in so for now we throw on our bikinis and head to the beach. A bunch of our classmates are here already, allowing us to share their alcohol and invite us back to their house for the first-night party.

  My phone pings and I have a Facebook message from Aiden.

  Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do ;)

  What does that mean? And where did it come from? This is the first message he’s thrown in a winky face and got a little flirty. I’m not even drunk yet but I’m lighter somehow.

  So nothing is off limits? I put my phone away before I can see his answer. Doesn’t he still have a girlfriend—no, a fuck buddy? I can’t think about that right now.

  We grab a quick dinner, hop on the bus to take us home and get ready for the night out. The party house is about seventy blocks in the opposite direction from our place and the only way to get us there and back is on the bus that doesn’t even run all night.

  It’s no surprise the party house owners are the most popular guys in our grade. There are a crazy number of bedrooms in this place, every ounce of counter space is packed with booze of all variety, and there’s even a deck and backyard. The music is so loud I’m sure someone will call the cops several times by the end of the week. I’m just hoping I’m not here when it happens.

  On the plus side, on Thursday Dan is coming down with Shane. It’ll be nice since they’re actual of the legal drinking age, but it means Tia and I will miss the best week-ending parties. But that’s when things will without a doubt get the most out of control.

  I think the entire grade is in this house tonight. Some are dancing, some are playing beer pong or flip cup, others are taking shots, and more are already in bedrooms hooking up.

  I’m not a big drinker and never have been because the stuff makes me beyond sick. Lucky for me, I am a big fan of weed and there’s an abundance to go around.

  The night passes in a literal blur and I find myself in line for the bathroom next to Tia. “I need to get outta here.”

  “We can’t drive and the bus doesn’t run for three more hours.” It’s not like we can walk seventy blocks inebriated in unknown surroundings. We’re stuck.

  Another hour passes with us wandering through the house with no real purpose. We’re starving, pissed off, and have walked into multiple rooms with people having sex.

  “Fuck it. Let’s walk to the bus station.” She agrees and we make the trek.

  “Should we find the others?” The rest of our group is spread out throughout the house and I don’t have the patience to search for them anymore.

  “I’m not worried about it. We can text Callie when we get to the station.”

  We head out to make the short walk to the main bus station. We walk for about two blocks when the sky opens into a downpour and accompanying thunderstorm. What a way to end the first night.

  The lightning is blinding, and the thunder is so loud it’s painful. We’re drenched and coming down off a buzz. We run the rest of the way to the terminal and collapse on the closest bench. An old guy collapses next to us and farts louder than I thought was possible. Our simmering buzzes allow us to burst into a fit of giggles.

  This was just the first night. What’s next?

  ∞ ∞ ∞

  After Tia and I make it back, we collapse into our separate beds and pass out hard. Every night repeats the same cycle and the days fly by in an unmemorable blur because we’re all too buzzed to remember anything.

  By Wednesday I’m preparing for Dan to come down tomorrow with Shane and my phone chimes with an incoming call from him.

  “Hey.” I’m on the beach with my friends and walk down to the water to take the call.

  “Change of plans. I can’t come down tomorrow anymore. I have to work.” His tone is clipped, and it’s hard to hear him.

  “Are you serious? I thought you requested off.” The water should be cold on my toes where the waves are crashing, but I can’t feel it. I’m too heated from this conversation to notice.

  He sighs heavily. “I guess I forgot. I don’t know, Chels, but I won’t be coming and I wanted to at least call you to tell you.”

  “Wow, thanks for being so considerate. You should win boyfriend of the year for how thoughtful you are. I’m sure everyone’s boyfriends forget to take off work for a vacation with their girlfriends, right? And yet, Shane remembered…so I guess it’s just you.” I hang up on him. Fuck him.

  I just got blown off by my own freaking boyfriend. I might be jumping the gun, but in this moment, after he promised he’d come no matter what, and he broke yet another promise, I’ve decided the relationship is toast. It’s nowhere near salvageable. I need to cut the dead weight and move on.

  Whether I want to blame it on my lack of sleep or on PMS, my attitude is ruthless today. I’m acting childish and bitchy, snapping at everyone, and I’m fed up already. And it’s only day three.

  Bailing on the beach early, I go back to the condo to sleep more. I get about fifty calls from my friends telling me to make my way to the party house as predicted. I’m pissy taking it out on them; I’m two years old and throwing a tantrum, refusing to go and trying to bring everyone else down with me. I’m a real blast and a half.

  Another issue gnawing at my nerves like a hungry piranha is Aiden. I haven’t heard from Aiden since our flirty little exchange. The conversation, though it was brief, is eating at me, always in the back of my mind. What did he mean and why did he say it at all?

  I get a call from an unknown number. My heart hammers in my chest. Could it be Aiden? No, it’s likely one of my friend’s on someone else’s phone.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, it’s Cole.” My heart stops. Cole is like, the hottest guy in school and also the most popular. He’s a soccer prodigy and one of the people staying
in the party house. Every girl wants to be with him so yeah, my heart goes into overdrive over the fact he called little ol’ me.

  “Hey…what’s up?” God, I sound like an idiot.

  “Get ready. You’re coming to my party. I have my car—I’ll pick you up.”

  He can’t be serious. Cole and I may run in the same crowd but I wouldn’t say we’re friends. Now he wants to show up to the party together? People will talk. Not that I care what people say about me, but it is a little suspect.

  I say the only thing I can say to him. “Okay, pick me up in thirty.”

  ∞ ∞ ∞

  Tia comes with Cole to pick me up which is a good buffer. I’ve never been great in social situations and I’m as awkward as a fish out of water. Tia’s much more outgoing than I am, plus she’s always had a thing for Cole, but she has a boyfriend and won’t do anything about her little crush.

  “Hey babe!” Tia shrieks into her phone when it rings. “Oh my God. Are you serious?” Even though I’m only seeing one side of her face from where I’m sitting, I can’ tell she’s lit up like fireworks on the fourth of July.

  Her entire demeanor has changed, and she’s close to bouncing in her seat with excitement. “I’ll text you the address. I can’t wait to see you.”

  She hangs up the phone and I ask the ever-so-obvious question. “Who was that?”

  “Shane’s here. He came down early to surprise me. Crap, I’m sure Dan’s gonna call you too.” She’s bashful as she pushes a strand of dark chestnut hair behind her ear.

  “No, he’s not. He’s not coming.” I turn my head to the side so I don’t see the pity take over her features.

  “Sorry, Chels.” Her voice is tender and slow, her pity for me weighing down every word. I don’t want to hear it.

  We get to the party and Cole heads inside right away while I wait outside with Tia until Shane gets here to pick her up.

  When I walk into the party, I apologize to my friends for being such a bitch and since they’re already wasted, they don’t even care. I scour the house looking for weed so I can get on my friends’ level of buzzed and out-of-control.